Having suicidal thoughts can be a scary and lonely experience, especially if you’re afraid of being honest with others about how you’re really feeling. But it’s important to talk about and get support for suicidal thoughts — even passive ones. Because although it’s scary, it shouldn’t be shameful, and it’s certainly not something we should hide.
To get a conversation started, we asked our mental health community to share with us one thing they wish others knew about their suicidal thoughts. For those of you who may be feeling this way, know you are not alone.
Here’s what they had to say:
1. “Just because I’m feeling suicidal doesn’t mean I’m planning to take my life. I just need help.” — Morgan S.
2. “Understand selfishness isn’t what drives those thoughts.” — Marjorie R.
3. “The difference between passive and active suicidal ideation… I don’t want to end my life, I just have moments where the exhaustion is too much.” — Erin N.
4. “The biggest misconception about suicidal thoughts is that people do it for attention.” — Melanie B.
5. “It’s not something I can just snap out of.” — Valerie R.
6. “I am not the boy who cried wolf. These thoughts and feelings are real each and every time.” — Stevie S.
7. “It hurts to feel this way, I don’t enjoy it.” — Olivia R.
8. “The thoughts exploit every weakness, every argument, even every triumph to make it something it shouldn’t be. The intrusive thoughts torment you until all you can think about is silencing them and that thought is quickly consumed by suicidal ideation.” — Abby W.
9. “It’s so much more common than people realize. Suicide doesn’t have a face. It can be anyone.” –Kellyn R
10. “What I truly want is to be saved — to not feel like suicide is the only option I have.” — Abi T.
11. “If we could use a switch to turn [off] the unwanted suicidal thoughts, we would.” — Natalie M.
12. “My thoughts aren’t caused by others. It’s not their fault.” — Wesley C.
13. “Suicidal thoughts aren’t [confined] to a specific time of when they start and end. [For me,] they are a constant feeling that never leaves.” — Emma J.
14. “ It’s not something I can control. The thoughts come from nowhere and are nearly impossible to will away.” — Christina L.
15. “ Just because I smile and laugh doesn’t mean my suicidal thoughts are me being silly… My smiling is for your benefit so you can’t see how much it’s hurting me to simply exist on a daily basis.” — Monica E.
16. “It’s not about dying, it’s about escaping the noise in my head at the time.” — Meghan B.
17. “I wish people knew that when I seem distracted or in my own world, I’m fighting an internal battle. Some days it takes every fiber of my being to keep going and a kind word can make all the difference.” — Sean H.
18. “Working through these thoughts and feelings is hard, be patient with me.” — Becky B.
19. “I’m torn between wanting to end the pain and not wanting to hurt my loved ones.” — Wade D.
20. “I wish others knew that sometimes these thoughts are just as scary and frustrating to me as they are to you.” — Jessica L.
By Juliette Virzi via https://themighty.com/2017/03/suicidal-thoughts-what-i-wish-i-could-tell-you/